In coaching, words can hurt young athletes as much as a physical injury.

Every coach has his or her own method of relating to athletes but, whatever the method, the choice and timing of words is critical. Coaches should explain their communication style early, so their athletes are prepared for potential emotional exchanges in practices and games and will not see themselves as victims of abusive behavior, says the September issue of the Penn State Sports Medicine Newsletter.

Julian Morrow, Ph.D., sports psychology expert at Iona University in New York, notes that coaches revert to their basic personalities in critical situations. Their athletes should understand and recognize these personality traits for what they are. At the same time, coaches have to guard against saying something that they will regret later.

Morrow told the newsletter that coaches can prevent hurt feelings by saying to athletes: "When I criticize you in practice or a game, I'm trying to teach you something or to correct something. What I say will be about your behavior, not about you personally."

Keith Zembower, M.Ed., a youth sports consultant in Dallas who has coached four sports, has several suggestions for coaches:

-- Don't berate players. Sports requires building confidence, not tearing it down. Avoid sarcasm and belittling remarks.

-- Avoid cursing. The stronger the language, the more it affects the player, especially the younger player. Coaches must take their role model status seriously. One coach used to tell his players not to use any language they would not use with their parents and he would do the same.

-- Be careful about throw-away remarks. Negative comments, even when soon forgotten by the coach, can be internalized by some children and adolescents and result in major problems in later life. Example: "Sometimes, I don't think you guys are smart enough to beat this team." A player with poor self-esteem does not need to hear that kind of negative talk from a coach. A better example: "We are smart enough to beat this team. Now. let's figure out how to do it."

-- Be honest. Coaches should develop one-on-one relationships with their players, talk to them privately and let them know where they stand. Then, if they have to correct them or pull them out of a game, the athletes know why. They may not like it, but they will at least understand it. Example: "I'm taking you out because he keeps beating you on the boards. I've got to have somebody in there who can get us more rebounds."

-- Be consistent in treatment of team members. Coaches should follow through with the same penalties for everyone when rules are broken. The quickest way for coaches to lose respect is to treat their best players differently than they treat others.

Zembower told the newsletter that, even at home and in their office, coaches should anticipate what might happen during an intense moment in sports. They should then think through and practice the responses they will use when the actual event takes place.

The opposite extreme of being too permissive should likewise be avoided, Zembower says.

"There is a trend toward wanting to be known as the player's coach," he notes. "That implies being buddies with your players, having fewer rules, and requiring less accountability. I think coaches should resist this trend."

Strict (but fair) teachers and coaches are not appreciated until later. In the meantime, they can have an extremely beneficial influence over the lives of young athletes, he told the newsletter.